Stick Figures: The Art World’s Next Craze

People say you have to be a master of realism before you can properly paint with simplicity. I
guess I was good enough to skip the first part.
If I’m being honest, I’ve been sick and tired of what contemporary art has had to offer lately.
Paintings of dots and multicolored rectangles are just so … common. True admirers of fine art
are dying to see an original style of expression. That’s why I reinvented a forgotten art style that
has yet to make a big, mainstream splash.
You see, we never actually got too old to make stick figures. In actuality, we were just too
immature to see their potential. I’m glad to now see the truth, and I’ve been doing my part to
make sure that everyone else does too.
I’ve gone above and beyond to show the world my stick-figure art. Beaches are known to have
caricature artists, but mine now has a stick-figure artist. The couples I paint stick figures of don’t
even tip me, and I understand why. You just can’t put a price on real art.
Just like the spelling-bee circuit, the art world is an incredibly exclusive industry these days, so
breaking into it falls on you, and you alone. To that end, I took it upon myself to put my
masterwork, “Man with Hat,” in the town’s art museum. You’ll find it in the area with the flickering
lights, right next to my favorite installation: the all-text painting called “WE’RE MOVING
LOCATIONS ON 1/3/2024.” It’s the only art piece in the museum, which is an honor. You can’t
miss it.
To get my work out there even more, I volunteered as a sketch artist at the police station. They
said my painting wouldn’t help them find the suspect, probably because the eyes I painted were
too easy to get lost in.
After spreading my art to every place I could, I honestly had mixed emotions when I first noticed
that it was starting to catch on. When I was eating dinner at a buddy’s house, I spotted a
stick-figure drawing on his fridge, which was of a couple. His young son, who’s apparently an art
prodigy, was the one who made it. At first, seeing this masterful imitation of my work made me
feel my days of stick-figure painting were behind me. I then realized it was time for me to think

like an adult, reminding myself that, after all, imitation is the highest form of flattery. Inspiring the
next generation of artists is an honor I don’t take for granted.
See you at my art shows,
Brady